My own personal fantasy world.

'Golden Fields', Italy, Montepulciano, Countryside

I ended up not going to school at all yesterday. I suddenly felt sick and because of that went home, collapsed in bed and mostly felt sorry for myself. So yeah, I stayed home from school today to. I’m still not feeling quite well/normal yet, but I’m getting there. At least now I’ve gotten the will back to start writing. Which I didn’t have at all yesterday. I usually don’t when I’m feeling unwell. 

The thing I hate most about being sick is that whenever I seem to be I never remember what I dream when I fall asleep, which I really hate. Since there is something I love almost as much as writing, that thing is sleeping. And I love sleeping because I dream when I sleep. Dreaming is the most amazing thing, at least that’s what I think. It’s like my very own personal fantasy world. The fact that just about anything can happen just makes me love it more than I already do. Dreaming is my uttermost biggest resource for inspiration. I can’t even begin to tell you just about how many of my books have originated from dreams. Well, most of them have at least. I tend to even like nightmares. Some might find that weird but for me it’s not. As a writer I think even nightmares can give me great ideas, and dreams I might have believed to be nightmares I actually can find being able to turn into something else. Simply saying dreaming is awesome and I don’t know how I would survive without it.  

Stuck with the same old me.

One and Other-Mental Health

Image by Feggy Art (formerly Victius) via Flickr

This will be a really short post since it’s getting really late and I have to go to sleep since it’s a school day tomorrow/today. I’m in a small state of panic and anxiety right now, and I’m not really sure about what to do. The thing that’s bothering me is life itself. I mean just barely after I’m starting to get fine again another thing happens and brings me down again. Sometimes I wish I was a cold-hearted person so I didn’t care about anything there’s possibly to care about. That way I could just do whatever I wanted and enjoy life more. But no, I’m stuck being me. The same old cowardly, confused, anti-social me as always.

I’ll be making a longer post after school today, now I really and seriously have to go to sleep. Or else I will probably fall asleep during class tomorrow. Which I might do anyway. Who knows?

I need to rest, sleep, or just whatever…

Location of Sweden

Image via Wikipedia


The difference between how a swedish blog is compared to an english one is: that here in Sweden we tend to write mostly about what we do during the day. It’s also really popular to post pictures of yourself with the so-called “todays outfit”. Basically every blogger simply shows the readers what they wear everyday (something I don’t really understand why it became so popular). It’s also quite common that Swedish blogs contains really short blog posts. Like so short that you could post it on twitter. Simple things like on sentence (like goodnight!, going out, dinner time! and stuff like that).

While english blogs on the other hand tend to have longer posts and often they are about a specific topic. I rarely see blogs where there are short posts, I also haven’t seen even one “todays outfit”, something that I’m kinda happy about. I really don’t get the point of it. But everyone’s free to do as they like. I guess. 

Anyway, this post will be short, since I have to go to bed now. Only tomorrow and friday left, then I will finally have sometime of from school and I’ll be able to rest. I really need to do that. Rest.  


The smallest thing could change everything. I really believe.

Vector image of two human figures with hands i...

Image via Wikipedia

So I’ve spent the entire evening working on an assignment I got from school. It’s ridiculously complicated. For being my first homework this term at least. Right now I’m watching a movie called “Catch and Release”. It’s kinda nice. Jennifer Garner’s in it and I think she’s really good for the role. Kind of touching story and all that as well. 

I don’t really have any idea what I’m gonna talk about today. I have Spotify commercial in my ears right now, no, wait, Show Me What I’m Looking For with Carolina Liar just came on. I love that song so much. And they’re my favorite band of all time. I’ve listened to every song they made and I love each and every one of them. I still don’t know what I’m going to tell you right now. I’m really bad at blogging when you have to get all deep and thoughtful in a certain topic. It just becomes so hard when you actually have to think about it. It’s much easier to just write about your own day and what happened. But that would probably be boring for you to read every single day. My life’s not that interesting either so that would probably just bore you even more, sadly enough. When I think about it my life’s pretty sad. Not like I’ve had some childhood drama or something like that (if you don’t count my parents divorce) but other than that, and it didn’t affect me that much. Okay sorry I just lied, I think. Of course it affected me, I don’t know in exactly what way but it helped me become who I am at this very moment and probably I wouldn’t be here at this place, at this moment, right now if things had turned out otherwise. Don’t you find that funny? How the smallest thing could change anything (like that movie “The Butterfly Effect” – awesome by the way!). I really do believe that, that’s why even if I would get the chance to, I wouldn’t change anything in my past since all the stuff that happened to me probably wouldn’t happen if I changed something in the past. When I think about it there are many moments I wish I had done that instead of what I did, said something else instead of what I now did say. Sure it might be tempting, but when I stop and think some more I realize what I actually have in my life. All those things that I don’t want to lose. Like my family, my friends and all of that. Sure  have some shitty memories that I wish I didn’t have, but still, you get my point right? 

To end this post quite awkwardly I’m saying that I’m going to bed now. Goodnight. 

Ps: you probably noticed the picture right? I chose it because it had the description; Vector image of two human figures with hands in contact, to represent togetherness. I love that word. Togetherness. 


Cover of "Heartsick"

Cover of Heartsick


The last few days I’ve been doing pretty much nothing. I rented a book at the library (Heartsick by Chelsea Cain). It was really good, I do recommend it for those of you who like psychological thrillers and who haven’t read it yet. This is what it says on the back of the book: 

‘Are you scared?’ Gretchen asks. She dabs his forehead with the cloth, his cheek, the back of his neck, his collarbone. He thinks he sees a flash of emotion in her eyes. Sympathy? Then it’s gone. ‘Whatever you think this is going to be like,’ she whispers, ‘ it’s going to be worse.’ 

When beautiful serial killer Gretchen Lowell captured her last victim – the man in charge of hunting her down – she quickly established who was really in control of the investigation. So why, after ten days of horrifying physical and mental torture, did she release Detective Archie Sheridan from the brink of death and hand herself in?  

Two years on. Archie returns to lead the search for a new killer, whose resent attacks on teenage girls have left the city of Portland reeling. Shadowed by vulnerable young reporter Susan Ward, Archie known that only one person can help him climb into the mind of this psychopath. But can Archie finally manage to confront the demons of his past without being consumed by them? 

The thing that got me to read this book is what the stuff people has said about it. Specially; 

‘Dark, distressing and disturbing, Heartsick is also a triumph of the human heart. Just pray you never meet Gretchen’ – VAL MCDERMID 

‘With Gretchen Lowell, Chelsea Cain gives us the most compelling, most original serial killer since Hannibal Lecter’ – CHUCK PALAHNIUK 

‘What may be the creepiest serial killer ever created. This is an addictive read!’ – TESS GERRITSEN 

‘Up there in the same league as Silence of the Lambs for sheer heart thumping excitement’ – DAILY MAIL 

Yesterday I visited my friend when she had a gig at a sort of “festival” like event. She had a gig together with her brother, and they where really good! They only sang already known and famous songs but still.. 

Today I was supposed to be introduced to a certain somebody’s new girlfriend. But I was to tired and ended up staying at home instead. But I’m sure everyone else had a nice time out today. I enjoyed staying at home alone, for once. Since my little sister came into the family it seems that there is always someone at home when I am. And when they’re out they’re not gone for long. That’s why I’ve come to really enjoy the time I get alone. Sometimes I actually more prefer to be alone than hang out with others. People tend to find that weird, and I don’t understand why. Do you? 

A boring post.

The title card for the musical comedy series G...

Image via Wikipedia


Something unusually boring to know about today:

I was supposed to go camping with my class today. I decided I’m to lazy to do that and went to school instead. There I did pretty much nothing. Simply just sat in my seat and did nothing. Well, yeah, I watched two episodes of Glee. Kind of funny show, but I’m not really sure about it yet… That’s the boring thing about today.

Perhaps this will be just as boring, but I don’t care. This is not my first blog. I deleted my last blog because it became to boring. I have a swedish blog to, so it just got tiresome to write the same thing over and over again. That’s why I decided that I won’t be posting ridiculously long posts about what I do each day. Hopefully I won’t at least. School started three days ago and we haven’t done anything special and yet I’m dead tired every day since. I guess it’s because it’s school. I never liked it much, but then again, who ever does? No one I know. Today I’m kinda boring so I’m gonna go to sleep now and then come back tomorrow as a more fun and interesting person.

Hello whoever you might be!

This is Animedia's Favicon, created for the site.

Image via Wikipedia


Well, first of all I would like to thank you for visiting my site! I already explained what this site is about on the about page, but in case you can’t find it or maybe you’re just to lazy to actually check it. Then here goes:

Right now, this very moment, I’m a 17 year old happy girl. I live life without as much as a clue what there is to it. I just keep moving trough each and every day. My heads full of thoughts and ideas and I’m constantly trying to find answers to the question I find each and every day in life. I’m still in the progress of finding out just who exactly I am. At times I’m really paranoid, other times extremely happy, other times depressed and sometimes really sad. Like most other teenagers my emotions are still not quite in check yet. They’re all over the place. I’m literally scared of nearly everything. Because of that I might come across as a extremely cautious person. I enjoy the little things in life, and life in itself (sometimes). Other from that I like spending time with my family, manga and anime, TV, movies and music. But over every thing else I love writing seeming as I one day hope to become an author. Right now I can’t seem to remember if I’ve forgotten something or not. But I guess that it will be revealed sooner or later in the blog. Or something.